Ilham

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” -Leo F Buscaglia

My favorite student at AMAP is a little girl named Ilham, she’s the only one who can say the entire alphabet, count to 100 and has mastered the conventional greetings in English.  I know I shouldn’t have favorites and I pay attention to them all but she is by far the one I enjoy working with the most.  She has the longest eyelashes with big brown eyes and this very shy smile that is only reserved for moments when she doesn’t think anyone else is looking.  She is an absolute perfectionist, I watched her copying lines on her chalkboard and unless her letters were absolutely perfect she erases them and starts all over again.  Not only is she smart, but she’s a sweetheart who likes to help the other children when they struggle, but she has just enough attitude to hold her own when the boy who sits next to her has elbowed her one too many times.  

I wish there was a way to make sure she get’s everything she wants out of life.  Earlier in the weeks a man in the education system came to tell us about how the whole system worked.  Little boys get preferential treatment.  The administrator who came to talk to us explained how he and his older sister (only a year older) went to school together...both were smart but everyday when they arrived home his sister had to wash the clothes, make dinner, 

                      sweep up the house, as well as a variety of other chores before she could even sit down to do her homework.  Then in the morning she would have to get up earlier then the rest of her family to start breakfast.  So not only did she work harder at home and go to bed later than her brother but she got up earlier and was still expected to get her homework finished.  He said that by the time they hit secondary school he had greatly surpassed her in school and then when faced with the choice to go to University the family only had enough money to send one and she had a marriage proposal so the family sent the boy.  I’d be livid.  And with every fiber of my being I don’t want that to happen to Ilham...I want her to be able to go to University and then settle down with the man of her dreams.  I want her to be able to be anything she wants to (and if I spoke more Kiswahili I would ask what she wants to be when she grows up).

At the end of the day I want them all to succeed.  That’s why at the end of every lesson I go around and give each of them a high five.  I make sure I look each one in the eye and gives them a thumbs up when they’ve done something good...and they all know how to “pound it” but I’ve been teaching them all how to pound it and then “blow it up” and it is one of the most satisfying feelings in the world to watch their faces light up at this little bit of attention they are paid.  Even Ilham who is by far the smartest one in the class is never praised by the teacher...no one is.  This kids definitely don’t need to be coddle because life here is hard enough without false expectations but they need to know when they’ve done something really good...we all do.